Author: Judi Curry

Who would have thought that a mature babe like me would fall “head over heels in love” with a man much younger than me? A man, by most standards, that fits the ”tall, dark and handsome” description. A man that is polite; humorous, amorous, concerned about the welfare of people he knows, and would willingly do anything for someone that needed help.

He sounds ideal so what’s the problem? Simply put, he is not interested in me; not because of the age difference because that doesn’t seem to matter. Not because we are not compatible, because we have a great time together; not because our sex life is bad, because it is great, but because he has been burned before and is afraid it will happen again. He promised himself that he would never, ever, make another commitment to a woman, and he wants to stick to that promise. It became such an issue that he decided not to see me again. Ever. He felt that I was becoming too attached – I was – and he was afraid of that attachment. And, although he has sort of admitted it – he, too, was becoming attached.

Oh Boy! There are several new restaurants that have opened in Ocean Beach that I want to try. The first one I watched getting ready for opening day was quite a surprise. I thought it was going to be an extension of the Italian restaurant next door. Imagine my surprise – and I would venture to guess that many others were surprised also – when a “Northern Mediterranean” restaurant by the name of Kecho’s Cafe opened up at 1774 Sunset Cliffs Blvd. It is just a few steps away from the “Olive Tree Market”, and is owned by the same people.

It is very small, with limited seating in the front of the building and a long hallway opens into a patio where there is also limited seating. When we arrived at 5:15pm, there was a large party in the patio area, and only two tables available in the front part of the restaurant. We chose to eat in the patio.

Many months ago I wrote an article that caused a huge rift in my family; many responses from Rag readers to the point that we needed to shut down the article because of the intensity of the comments from the readers. Because I do not want to rekindle that discussion again, I am asking my daughter to read this article over before I sent it on to be published.

The first article spoke of a granddaughter of mine, age 15, that was going to be retained in her high school for not completing her assignments in any of her classes. As an educator myself, I was appalled to think that in today’s society a young student would be forced to repeat all the classes of a particular grade because work was not turned in. To make matters worse, my field of expertise was teaching teachers how to “Individualize the Curriculum” and how to teach to the needs of the student. I felt that this was not being done in the case of my granddaughter.

He’s sitting at the bar, nursing a drink when an attractive lady sits down next to him.
“Do you come here often?” she asks.
“No, this is my first time here.”
“Where have you been?”
“In prison.”
“Why? What did you do?”
“I killed my wife.”
“Oh! That means you’re single?”

After almost two months of on-line dating, my research is over. Although it was an interesting experience, it bore little, if any fruit, and was an expensive project. A little background:

I am a widow of almost three years. I am reasonably attractive – for an old broad -; have not yet begun to show that Alzheimer’s runs in my family; like to cook; like to read; like to write. Still physically active – walk my 11 year old Golden Retriever 1-2 miles a day; like the human touch and miss the hugs and comfort that a man can give me. I am a retired educator – public as well as governmental; have 3 grown daughters and a passel of grandchildren. With all that in mind, I signed up with 3 “on-line dating services” : “Senior People Meet”; “BB People Meet” – Big and Beautiful – and Match.com. I originally signed up for EHarmony.com, but it was too costly and I did not complete the application.

Friday, February 10, 2012 @ 7:00 AM. Went to get on the “35 bus” at the “temporary” bus stop on Orchard and Sunset Cliffs Blvd. only to find out that this temporary stop is temporarily shut down. How do I know this? Because there is a cute little “sleeve” covering the bus stop sign with an arrow running through it, signifying “no bus service.”

Was I given any notice about this? Were my three foreign language students that take this bus given any notice of the change? Hell no! Did they ride the 35 and 923 bus yesterday? Yes! Did they ride the bus the day before? Yes. Then why wasn’t there some indication that the route would be changed? Who is running the Metropolitan Bus Service? Idiots? It’s not like the bus riders are driving a car and can drive to the next bus stop. They had no idea where the next working bus stop would be.

Today I received the following letter from the San Diego Branch of the Susan G. Komen For The Cure:

We have a very small office here in San Diego – so that the majority of the money we raised can go right back to the community. Last week’s political firestorm shook each of us to the core. It may also have rocked you. For the first time in my six years here, the integrity of this organization was questioned. Even after we took responsibility for the mistake and moved quickly to fix the problem, some said they would never have anything to do with Komen again.

Okay. I understand that. Everyone needs to make decisions that they can live with and feel good about.

But here’s the truth. While some may leave us, we will never leave you or the uninsured women that we fight for every day here in San Diego.

In my last article, I discussed my experience of getting back into the dating world. I ended by saying that I would do some more research, purely in the interest of helping other widows find lasting happiness in an otherwise lonely situation.

I only signed up with one dating service, initially. If you remember it was a site for seniors, yet my first date with my “boy toy” was with a man younger than my youngest daughter – 27 years younger than me. He was sexy, well toned, and either after my money (sic) or my bed. Maybe both. That relationship ended with him hanging up on me.

As a good researcher, I decided that I really needed to be signed up with more than one dating site, so I signed up with three more. I used the same profile; the same pictures, and the same physical description. I thought about reducing my age – but wanted to be honest. Why? Who knows?

Who has made MAN the guardian of women’s rights? Who has sanctioned other women telling other females that they are wrong because they want to have an abortion. Did you hear a candidate for President of the United States of America say, when it involves a woman pregnant from a rape, “Make The Best Out Of A Bad Situation”. Yes, that is what candidate Rick Santorum said when he commented on his opposition to abortion.

A woman’s body is her own. It does not belong to anyone else except that woman. No one should be able to tell a woman what to do with her body. Not her family; not her husband; not her significant other; not her religion. What she decides to do with it should be between her and her doctor. No one else.

Married at the age of 17; divorced at the age of 27; remarried at the age of 27, didn’t give…

It is not often that I venture away from the Ocean Beach/Pt. Loma and write an article about it. But my widow support group, me included, had such a wonderful experience at the Maritime Museum yesterday morning that I have to share it with you.

Once a week my group gets together and does something “for us.” It may be going out to lunch, either at someone’s home or to a restaurant. We have been to movies; shopping; walks, etc. and today we did something new. We went to the BERKELEY to see the art exhibit of Cook, Melville and Gauguin courtest of the Kelton Foundation.

There are many heartbreaks in our lives. There are many episodes that throw us into deep despair, wondering if we can/will survive. There are many situations that seem impossible to rectify, yet, somehow, the next day dawns with the same bright sun – unless, of course, you live in Ocean Beach and wake to another foggy day – and you put one foot in front of the other as you circulate throughout the day.

There are also some situations that you cannot see any way out of and still keep your sense of humor; your fortitude; your desire to plod on. Instead of being lifted from the doldrums, you are sucked deeper and deeper into the black hole beneath your feet.

JANUARY: The repair work on Sunset Cliffs will finally be finished. The only problem was that during the installation of the new pipes, the cliffs eroded so much that there can no longer be any auto or pedestrian traffic on the street.

FEBRUARY: The post office, in their infinite wisdom has closed the processing center on Midway drive, thus opening the way for Lindbergh Field to take it over for the new runway.