FDA Labels Cheerios a “Drug” – not kidding

by Erik Deckers / Laughing Stock / May 18, 2009

The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) is now classifying Cheerios —— those little round O’s made of oats that have been around since 1941 —— as a drug, and sent a letter to General Mills saying as much.

They even put the letter on their website: “Based on claims made on your product’s label, we have determined that your Cheerios Toasted Whole Grain Oat Cereal is promoted for conditions that cause it to be a drug.”

Uhh, do you realize that this is a breakfast cereal made out of oats and modified corn starch? People eat it with milk, as a part of a balanced breakfast. My kids used to eat them by the fistful when they were babies.

Keep in mind this is the same FDA that has allowed a number of big pharma drugs onto the market, only to recall them because “painful, needless death” was a common side effect for some of them. The same FDA that Congress wants to investigate their medical device review process, because they have “corrupted and interfered with the scientific review of medical devices.”

So does this mean that General Mills have been poisoning the entire world for the last 68 years, or is the FDA doing their usual bang-up job?

The FDA’s biggest complaint, not including the one that no one takes them seriously anymore, is that General Mills claims that Cheerios can help lower bad cholesterol.

According to an article on Canada.com, the FDA says these claimes show that Cheerios are “. . .intended to be used to lower cholesterol and prevent, lessen or treat the disease hypercholesterolemia, and to treat and prevent coronary heart disease.”

Which means the FDA assumes the product is a drug. Which means General Mills cannot market Cheerios as they are, unless they apply for approval for a new drug, or changes the way it labels it.

Look for the FDA to begin regulating exercise tapes and programs, gym memberships, and for the Drug Enforcement Agency to begin cracking down on Cocoa Puffs and Fruit Loops. Cap’n Crunch will be taken into custody, and the Trix Rabbit will be gunned down in a drive-by, with no clue to the shooter, other than a handful or orange stars, green clovers, and blue diamonds.