City Council to Announce Plans for Two Homeless Shelters in Point Loma

by on April 1, 2012 · 13 comments

in Ocean Beach, Satire

Sunset Cliffs and Silvergate Elementary Schools to be Converted to Large Scale Service Communities

The Mayor and members of the San Diego City Council will hold a press conference today at 3:00 p.m. to  announce plans for what has been termed, two “Mega Service Centers and Shelters for the Homeless,” to be established in Point Loma.  Mayor Jerry Sanders’ office announced the press conference yesterday.  When contacted for comment, mayoral spokesman, John Galt, said, “We have had to be a bit secretive, but the plans for the centers have been over two years in the making.  We are very excited about how well these particular sites will suit the needs of so many.”

A member of the City Planning Department, on the condition of anonymity, said the continued drop in enrollment at Silvergate and Sunset Cliffs Elementary Schools provided the perfect opportunity to turn the much needed space into what she termed, Mega Service Centers and Shelters for the Homeless.  Plans include housing for 500 men at the Sunset Cliffs site and for 275 women at Silvergate.  She went on to say along with housing, there are plans for on-site medical and counseling services, cafeterias for residents and drop-ins, full scale drug and alcohol rehabilitation centers, and job training.  Additionally, the Sunset Cliffs site will have a full acre for “car-camping” complete with hook ups and septic systems.

In a pre-conference statement issued by Councilman Kevin Faulconer’s office, “The school sites have been chosen for conversion due to decline in school enrollment over the past five years.  It seems any parents who value the education of their children have been enrolling them in private school.  Why waste the land on a few children who will not receive the type of education to excel, and will probably be residents of the facility when they are grown.”

Further search of records and permits indicate the shelters are part of what appears to be a much larger plan.  McMillan Companies have been awarded the contract to demolish the schools and build the new facilities; 75,000 square feet and three stories at Silvergate and 120,000 square feet and four stories at Sunset Cliffs.  As an incentive, the Council has agreed to use eminent domain proceedings to obtain the area bordered by Sunset Cliffs Blvd., down to the water’s edge, Ladera St to the south, Hill St. to the north and Cornish Dr. to the east.  The plans indicate McMillian will raze the private residences razed and twenty homes will be built in an exclusive gated community.  The new community will be tentatively named, “Tierra de los Rico.”

{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }

OB DUDE April 1, 2012 at 9:01 am

Well…..Starbucks came to OB so nothing is impossible! Happy 4/1 to the Rag


editordude April 1, 2012 at 9:03 pm

OB Dude – Happy First to you too! This was so much fun, I wish we could do it everyday, you know avoid the real news and bask in nostalgic imaginations.


OB Mercy April 1, 2012 at 3:14 pm

Hee hee!


Molly April 1, 2012 at 8:37 pm

“Tierra de Los Ricos” sounds like right out of the Terriers plot. Except you moved it south some. Nice, biting irony.


bodysurferbob April 1, 2012 at 9:01 pm

no wonder you guys got shut down with stuff like this – pissing off those point loma people. they have friends in high places … also low places.


Jack April 2, 2012 at 12:45 pm

Just think of what we could have pulled off if Frank gave us more than three hours to pull something together. After I sent my article all sorts of other really “cool head trippin’ stuff,” came to mind. Ah well, plenty of time to plan for next year.


Frank Gormlie April 3, 2012 at 7:52 am

Jack, well, gee, ya know April first has been on the calendar now for quite some time.


Jack April 3, 2012 at 8:05 am

Ah, so we are required to read the mind of the editordude now…and that is one mind in which I would prefer not to take a Saturday afternoon stroll….


Frank Gormlie April 3, 2012 at 8:07 am

Why aren’t you working? You claimed in your last post you had a job!


Jack April 3, 2012 at 8:13 am

Pogue Mahone…I’m writing a letter to Toni Atkins and if you get off my back I might let you run it in the rag…so play nice.


August April 3, 2012 at 4:57 pm

The POVERTY PIMPS have no plans to end homelessness ever; it’s a BILLION DOLLAR INDUSTRY in San Diego county.


August April 3, 2012 at 4:58 pm

This is Human Warehousing……


August April 3, 2012 at 5:00 pm

“full scale drug and alcohol rehabilitation centers” = The 12-Step religious cult treatment protocol; you know, THE SAME ONE THAT SAVED WHITNEY HOUSTON’S LIFE!


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