By Bob Dorn
Time for another look at politics 2015.
No, no, no, don’t go back to Ultimate Fighting, or The Kardashians, or wondering whatever became of Justin Bieber, Justin Timberlake or that kid on Via Amnesia named Justin whose pants keep falling below his crack.
Forget the distractions for a moment and try to focus on wtf is going on.
Let’s look at the S-words, and the J-word.
One S-word is Sanders, short for Bernie Sanders. Another S-word is Socialist, that’s the elephant in the room.
Or should I say Elephant? The one with the trunk painted with stars and the body tastefully designed in basic reds and blues. No, no, that’s no good; Elephants shouldn’t be associated with Socialists. They aren’t Socialists, are they?
Let’s see, where was I…?
Oh yeah, there’s a J-word. What’s the J stand for? Just a minute, I gotta check a text coming in.
Let’s see, where was I at?
Oh, yeah, the J-word. That’s for …
JEWISH. !!!
OMG.
Can you say Jewish in public? Can it be associated with Politics 2015? I don’t think so. Well, maybe.
So, now what? Now that I’ve got the S-words out there, and the J-word, I’m suspended. Sanders, Socialist, Jewish.
He doesn’t have a chance.
* * *
Okay, I get it. Bernie can’t be elected because he’s a Socialist Democrat and he’s a Jew. There– I’ve said it. And you heard it here first.
So, let’s get real CBS, NBC, ABC and all the ships at sea, threatened by reality.
Bernie Sanders is a Socialist Jew who just happens to have caught y’all with your nuts in a career vise. There’s something out there that can’t be true ’cause, if it is really true, it defies what your bosses are telling you. Who you gonna call?
The money people, that’s who.
By Aug. 01, Bernie had raised $15M ($26 million at latest count), which really caught their eyes ’cause it’s money stained with sweat and blood — real money, the kind us little people use to pay our bills and to buy, with the little of it left over, a piece of good fresh fish.
Bernie’s $15M (now $26M at latest count) was 7% of what JEB!, Cruz, Rubio, Walker (remember him?), Christie, Paul, Kasich, Carson, Graham, Huckabee, Fiorina, Trump, Pataki and Santorum collectively raised. Seven Percent! Why, that was as much as Gov. Perry raised!! Rick Perry! Remember him?
“Why, $15M, that’s a third of what Cruz raised, and about 12.5% of what JEB! did.
And… well, he’s a Socialist!”
But you gotta hand it to Bernie; he seems more legit now. True, Hillary Clinton had $68M, or almost 5 times that $15M, but, still, that $15M caused everybody in media to wonder if they shouldn’t be covering him.
They tried to ignore the crowds he was attracting until they couldn’t any longer. The 27,500 in Los Angeles were a lot of people.
Here’s the LA Times giving context to the August 11 overflow crowd in the Memorial Sports Arena the night before:
“…many political analysts and even some of (Bernie’s) supporters say his chances of winning the Democratic nomination are slim. Polls suggest that most of his supporters would back a Clinton candidacy if she becomes the nominee.”
Is that all they had? People who like Bernie would vote for Hillary Clinton? So, they shouldn’t vote in the primaries for Bernie because … Hillary?
Media sorta did ignore the annoying fact that the same number or close to it (more than 26,000) showed up in Boston on Oct. 03. Maybe it was just getting to be an old story, and no longer worth the time because they had to get back to the Donald for some new quotes.
Plus it came on a busy news weekend. Hurricane Joaquin was destroying South Carolina’s trickle-down infrastructure and somebody (we still don’t know who) was ordering the bombing of doctors and patients in Afghanistan. Media was spread thin.
When Sanders was reported to have raised $26M off small donations at the end of the Federal Elections Commission reporting period, that’s when the din was raised to… He Really Can’t Win!
Which brings me back to the S-word and the J-word.
Socialism? Sure, why not? Even George Bush, when he was reelected in 2008, couldn’t privatize social security (by putting your retirement fund in the hands of Goldman Sachs). Social Security remains a popular institution.
Do you use airports? Those are government operations. Would you rather see Mark Zuckerberg or Jeff Bezos run the nation’s airports for profit? How ’bout Medicare? Do you think Medicare would raise the price of a generic cancer drug from $13.50 to $750 each dose, like the skank bastard who bought an entire drug company so he could do it? Ask a 65-year-old if they’d like to see Medicare privatized.
Socialism isn’t a problem for Norway, Sweden, Germany, Denmark … some of the most secure and prosperous societies in the world. The anti-socialism incantation cast over the nation — with the eager help of media push-pens and microphones — can’t be allowed to rise over the rest of us who’re still sane and creative, and believe in equal pay for equal work, and in the good life provided by it.
Finally, the J-word.
Pretty soon we’re going to see some purposely thoughtful and elaborate — and not to forget responsible — pundits talking about the problem we have elevating a Jew to the presidency. We’ve had lots of high government officials. There’s been Henry Kissinger, who had Nixon’s ear, and Alan Greenspan, of the Federal Reserve. Joe Lieberman was elected Vice President but was overthrown along with Al Gore by Scalia and Thomas of the Supreme Court. Dianne Feinstein and Barbara Boxer were the first Jewish female senators.
The closest a Jew has come to the presidency was Barry Goldwater, who won the Republican nomination to oppose LBJ’s 1964 reelection. He couldn’t overcome the tenor of the times, which, after the Kennedy assassination, was still confoundedly liberal, and not much in favor of nuclear war (Goldwater advocated using atomic bombs in North Vietnam in a campaign interview). He lost big to LBJ.
Can a Jewish Socialist become president?
Sure. If enough people who like what they’re seeing in him actually vote for him.
Now back to FOX, CBS, NBC, ABC, CNN, PBS, USA Today, People, NRA News, Shotgun News, Breitbart, Matt Drudge, The Blaze and the rest of the damn liberal media, where he doesn’t stand a chance.
Yiddish Socialist Magazine cover, circa 1932
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This first appeared at San Diego Free Press.
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